how to sleep better (even when you have kids)
In my 40s, I realised something I wish I’d known earlier:
No matter how clean I eat or how often I train, if I don’t sleep well, I would literally feel like sh*t the next day.
But when I do sleep well? I’d wake up feeling unstoppable - like Bradley Cooper in Limitless. Honestly, it’s the closest thing I’ve found to a legal performance-enhancing drug.
I used to think health was just nutrition + exercise.
But sleep is the foundation. The key to longevity. Everything else builds on it.
Now, it’s the #1 thing I optimise - for myself and my family.
And the goal is simple:
Get at least 7-8 hours of sleep every night.
What Helped Me Sleep Better
I’ve tested a lot of things to improve both the quantity and quality of my sleep. These are the ones that genuinely made a difference:
Sunrise
Get morning sunlight within 30-60mins of waking
Regular exercise
Taking magnesium glycinate daily
No alcohol
No coffee at least 8 hours before bed (for me, this means no coffee after 2pm. Caffeine has a half-life of about 8-10 hours for most adults. This means it typically takes 8-10 hours for your body to completely clear caffeine from your system.)
Sunset
The 3-2-1 Rule:
No food 3 hours before bed. This is to lower your resting heart rate before bed. As Bryan Johnson puts it: “The single strongest predictor of sleep quality is how low your resting heart rate is before bed.” As a family, we aim to have dinner at 6pm.
No drinks 2 hours before bed (so you’re not waking up to pee).
No screens 1 hour before bed (This one’s the hardest. If I’m working or reading something intense, my brain gets too fired up. But something light, like a comedy, is usually fine.)
Avoid bright artificial lights after sunset (go full vampire mode after 8pm, dim lights or red bulbs work great)
Hot bath, shower or sauna in the evening
Cold room temperature (18-19°C is my sweet spot)
A completely pitch-dark room
Use a weighted blanket (I have a separate blanket to my wife so she doesn’t accuse me of stealing her side of the blanket 😂)
Underrated Sleep Hacks No One Talks About
These might sound unusual, but they’ve helped me personally:
Applying lymphatic drainage oil on my face and neck - especially around lymph nodes. One of the deepest sleeps I’ve had came right after I started using this.
Rubbing magnesium gel on the soles of my feet before bed.
Sprinkling Epsom salts in a warm bath - simple and surprisingly effective.
Having calm music ready to go - if the kids are fighting or have a melt down before their 8:30PM bedtime, I’d put on some calm music to help de-escalate the chaos (this is my go-to). Otherwise, their resting heart rate spikes, and so does mine :)
👉 A Quick Note
I don’t use any fancy biohacking gear - no Eight Sleep bed, no red light panels, no mouth tape, no HEPA filters. I haven’t even tried a sleep mask.
Just a regular king-sized bed, an Apple Watch to track my sleep, and a few low-tech, old-school habits that work surprisingly well.
I might experiment with the other stuff down the line. But for now, I’m keeping it simple.
My Top 4 Sleep Protocol (80/20 Formula)
If I had to strip it down to the minimum effective dose, these are my top 4 daily non-negotiables that almost always guarantee a good night’s sleep:
Get in bed by 10:30 PM
I wake at 7:00 AM. Count back 8 hours for sleep + 30 mins to wind down = in bed by 10:30. 9 times out of 10, that’s enough to hit my 7.5-hour target. Figure out your own “get-in-bed” time.No food 3-4 hours before bed
The longer the gap, the better. It helps digestion settle and keeps my resting heart rate low.Keep the room cold
18-19°C works best for me. Servicing the A/C regularly helped more of a difference than I expected.Take magnesium daily
This is the one supplement I’ve consistently felt a difference from, especially in calming my nervous system.
Fix your sleep and you fix everything.
I’m always testing and tweaking my sleep protocol.
Curious, what’s worked for you?